I’ll take Flattery with a side of Criticism and Spam, Please

Yes, I admit, I read my spam comments before I “Delete Permanently”.   Sometimes, the software gets it wrong, right?

After my absence this week, I had four comments in Spam –

The usual mistyped messages that look like someone took phrases from an “Effective Leadership” phrase book and lumped them all together.

But one caught my eye – I deleted it, and so cannot give you it verbatim, but here’s the gist:

“I enjoyed your blog – you’re such an expert – maybe you should put a couple of pictures in to illustrate it better.”

Which is quaint – how do you picture me musing?  A brain with some flashes of lightening over it?

Or the overused and much cliched light bulb?

But it did get me to thinking….


What if we all replied to the spammers?  What if we could send them private emails, call their house at 1:00 in the morning (hey, it’s 10 a.m. where I live – deal with it).

We could tell them thank you so much for helping me to make my blog better – any other hints?   In fact, since my blog has followers and yours doesn’t, because anyone who clicks to your site just gave you the door you needed to access their financial information, how about a cut, eh?   How much is it worth to you?

Since my blog will soon be shut down, due to the poor judgement of allowing you to display your link on it, it will take me some time to get up and running again.    And if I continue to help you, I will need to re-do my blog and blog name every two weeks or so….

So, if you’re a spammer, I’m happy to do business with you.  By my estimations of what you’ll get and what I’ll lose, I’m thinking that you can pay me $765,912 for each comment I approve.

Unless, I have some better offers from other spammers, in which case, the price just went up….

What?!? You’re upset?  Deal with it buddy, this is your version of capitalism…

10 thoughts on “I’ll take Flattery with a side of Criticism and Spam, Please”

  1. my brother has similar conversations with telelmarketers – asks them when they get out of work, what is their home phone number so he cancall them later when they sputter that he can’t do that, he responds”really? Why not, would it annoy you as much as you calling me at home after work bothers me?” They usually get the point.


      1. maybe the behavior is why you are off the lists? 🙂 He once told ATT that he would really like their plan, but unfortunately, he did not have a phone. As he was speaking on it at the time, they quickly got off the call, thinking he was nutty.


        1. I once told a telemarketer that we were too broke to go on vacation or buy any gew-gaws – instantly cut down on how many ‘buy this’ calls we got…


  2. I read them too, so far they have all been spammylicious, but I have heard that sometimes the software does mess up. I soooo love your sense of humor, keep it up 🙂


        1. Just sitting back, waiting for my ill-gotten gains to roll in –
          And having a fine and dandy time entertaining myself…
          Glad it entertained you, too…


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